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Collection (2017​-​2018)

by Aluminum Garden

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1.
Kamikaze 02:49
your memory lives between the spaces in my teeth digging holes and trenches so syrupy sweet till a smile is hard to see and it makes me wonder why i let her find her way inside my skin pull apart and tear me limb from limb my spine still aches this habit is hard to break watch the colours collect in a sickening spiral and swallow me down the drain and it makes me wonder why i thank her for tearing out all of the pages in history books i hung up on my shelf but she's so inviting so quick to give and settle down inside my chest a kamikaze pilot headed in
2.
it's so hard to sleep so much on my mind that i can't possibly keep track of it all can't it fade with the sliver of the moon i burrow into my cocoon this bed i've made a waiting room i toss and turn look up again to a sky burnt red and i know i can't win this one it's running me down i keep going in circles imagining circumstance i'll never know it's just that every time i think i'm getting comfortable losing myself and being on my own i come here and i sit and i stare at the glass and i know it reflects but nobody ever stares back and i don't know how much farther i can go before my string finally snaps and i'll fly higher and higher and higher and higher than ever before but tonight i want to take the ride and feel the blackness deep inside press fireworks into my eyes and dream a beautiful world alone again sitting up straight on the edge of my uncomfortable mattress the room is dark and i left the window open my nose is cold and i can feel the shivers coming on as i walk upstairs to the bathroom where i stare into the mirror a different place but the feeling stays the same doesn't matter where i am it'll never change so tonight i want to take the ride and feel the blackness deep inside press fireworks into my eyes and dream a beautiful world can i float like this till the end of time hear the angels singing sweet sunrise in my head nothing can ever die there's no fear but for the end of the night i'm not scared of you anymore i'm not scared of myself anymore i'm not scared anymore
3.
Nowhere 02:15
i want to stand in the middle of nowhere and scream out from high up above where there's nothing around that can hear me echo deeply with all of my love i am one with the sunlight i am one with the trees i am teeming with the atmosphere i am something no one can see i want to stand in the middle of nowhere and scream out from high up above i want to wither away with the landscape let it draw out the breath from my lungs let the earth forget all i have done
4.
Hazy Place 04:18
sit beneath my bed and watch the stars as they float over my head high above the atmosphere i lay no weight upon my chest always in a hazy place when i lock myself away for days on end funny how it looks like i am here when i couldn't be much farther from that filling up my mind with memories i came up with all alone nothing is as real as i create though people passing by don't see the things i see the streets around me light up the insects humming gracefully into my ear nothing is so sweet as the world inside myself let me disappear syncopate my inner world to realities i see i can be less of a disappointment if i'm not really me when i stumble to the ground outside it's only because i'm walking with my eyes closed again nothing there to catch me never when i need it can't stay in these familiar places long need to get away from here for a while movements i can't speak of the tiny pieces of myself i leave behind they won't last long
5.

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released April 28, 2019

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Aluminum Garden Kitchener, Ontario

It can’t decide what it wants, so it will be nothing at all.

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